The importance of having your own workspace

July 29, 2020 § Leave a comment

One of the abiding pictures that my son might recall about my anxiety and depression, years from now, is of me slumped in my favourite sofa chair, and dozing — at all times of the day. Today I made sure he won’t see me like that ever again. I dragged my work table from the living room to our bedroom, along with my chair and recreated my own workspace. Now when I need to, I can close the bedroom door — for a phone interview, for instance, or if I really badly need it, to put my head down on the table and take a powernap. But no more slouching in the sofa chair and dozing away, paralysed by anxiety.

The table was there in the living room in the first place because of a switch by my son, a couple of days back from another room that was made over to him to be his study and bedroom rolled into one. Now, in our bedroom, it is probably eating a few inches into the floor space my wife uses for her yoga in the evenings, but I’m hoping it will be worth it because it will help me reclaim my work day and in the process help me reclaim my whole day. In fact, today, after many many months, I sat at the table and worked post lunch, which had otherwise become a time for routinely taking a long nap and therefore a source of guilt about not working enough.

In a breakthrough of sorts for me, I got my parents to talk to my son on the phone this evening when I called my father. There’s no rift or anything between us, and they love their grandson very much. But, it has never been easy — more like near impossible — in my family for people to easily reach out to one another, even if just to talk about the small everyday things that happened. Just the opposite in my wife’s family, where everyone talks to everyone all the time and are happy to do so. My wife’s own day isn’t complete without the daily ritual of a decent chat with her mum late in the evening.

As to my parents and son, today, grandparents and grandson spoke for more than I’d expected and and the boy told them about his online school classes, his new-found skill with juggling — they have already seen a video of this — and various other things. My father too said he was happy he spoke with his grandson.

Oh, and I signed up for an introductory course on English literature. On Udemy.

#workspace #anxiety #anxietyanddepression #depression #family

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